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29th June 2017

Know Yourself

Last Sunday, Deb and I spent an evening with some of the younger leaders at King’s, talking about personality types. This is a fantastic group of young men and women, and we had a lot of fun doing a couple of personality tests and looking at the results, but amidst the laughter some important insights were emerging.

Knowing our strengths and weaknesses, having a realistic understanding of how others experience us, is vital if we are to work effectively as leaders. Below you will find a blog I posted in 2015 about the importance of knowing yourself. I hope you find it helpful.

'Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.' Oscar Wilde

Last week, I was fortunate to spend a few days at our ‘learning community’ in which leaders from several churches in the UK, the USA and elsewhere gathered for teaching and to spend time together as teams to reflect and plan for next steps. I particularly enjoyed hearing one of the guest speakers, Michael Fletcher. He leads a church of some 5000 people in North Carolina, USA, and I was eager to hear his insights on leadership. What would his advice be for taking your church to the next level? Powerful preaching? An effective outreach programme? Whilst all those are clearly important elements, it was reassuring that his first point was that good leaders know themselves.

The importance of knowing who I am is something I have been aware of for many years now. Of course, on first hearing it can sound a little like navel-gazing. Aren’t we in danger of becoming too self-absorbed, too introspective? Isn’t there a danger that spending too much time thinking about ourselves could prevent us from getting on with the real work of spreading the gospel and building God’s church? Naturally, if all you do is talk about yourself with others, you will soon turn your audience off. But I would argue that having a realistic awareness of who you are, your strengths and weaknesses, will make you a more effective leader in the long term. If spending time understanding yourself is part of an ongoing reflection on how you experience life and how others experience you, then it can lead to significant personal growth.

Recently, another leader came to talk to me about the options for his future. He shared some thoughts and possible paths for ministry and then asked for my comments. I paused for a while, wanting to give good counsel and then answered that at this stage in the process, self-awareness was crucial. To ensure a good fit wherever he ended up, he needed to consider who he is. These are some of the questions I suggested he ask himself: What season of life and ministry am I in? How do I process life? How do other people experience me? What are my primary and secondary gifts? What is my personality type? Having an understanding of all these aspects can ensure that we place ourselves where we are most likely to be effective for God and his church.

This blog was originally posted on 1st October 2015.

Image: Self Portrait in Vienna by Luca Sartoni, used under CC

Steve Tibbert

Posted by Steve Tibbert

Steve Tibbert leads King’s Church London, with sites in Catford, Downham, Lee and Beckenham. The church has seen continued growth since the mid-1990s, both in terms of size and diversity.

As well as leading King’s, Steve hosts and leads Newfrontiers, a fellowship of apostolic leaders with hundreds of churches around the world.

Steve is married to Deb. They have three grown up sons and one grandson.

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